Mobbing school and you're out

 

Bullying among pupils, a very sensitive topic - should not be undermined by teachers and parents. The longer bullying persists, the more difficult it is to find a solution.

The topic of bullying is our concern!

Dr. Karl Gebauer Expert in bullying prevention, Author and editor of numerous books on educational and educational questions.

Educational Experts:

Dr. Gebauer, what does "bullying" mean at all? Where do "harmless", "old-fashioned" conflicts end among children and where does bullying begin?

 

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Occasional quarrels and wrangling are part of everyday life of children. But bullying is an aggressive act and means that a student is bothered, harassed, or marginalized over a long period of time. The mobber - it can also be a mobberess - is bombarding others who support him in his humiliating actions. One speaks of bullying when everything grows on a child. The victim generally does not understand why it is offended, tormented and humiliated. This experience, "all are against me," severely impairs his self-esteem. It gets into an absolutely helpless situation and therefore almost always needs the help of other persons. Perpetrators want to meet, but do not get anything. They place great emphasis on the fact that adults do not have to look through their actions.

 

Educational Experts: What types of bullying are there?

Dr. Karl Gebauer: Bullying can be an indication, for example, if school items are damaged or rumors are spread.

It is possible that a student is excluded from group work. Humiliations are made through facial expressions, gestures and drawings. Insults of various kinds are reported on paperwork, in student magazines and in letters. Often victims are brought into humiliating situations and photographed with the mobile phone. Afterwards, the scenes are viewed together, e-mailed or even placed on the Internet. Among young people there is also sexual defamation.

Educational Experts:

Has the number of bullying cases in schools increased in recent years?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

It is difficult to judge whether there has been an increase because the comparative numbers are missing. The current figures on the frequency of the occurrence of bullying vary. This depends, among other things, on the definition of bullying. Some scientists assume that about one in six students can be viewed as bullying victims.

 

Educational Experts:

What makes children bully other children?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

First of all I would like to emphasize that children with a good sense of self-esteem do not have to bother others. They feel comfortable, have friends and usually also learners. Why should they humiliate others?

The causes of bullying are: deep injuries, experience of violence, traumatization, embarrassment and experiences of exclusion. Bullying feeds on an inadequate inner work model, with which a person tries to convert even experienced powerlessness into power. Bullying is based on a destructive-emotional dynamic. This can develop when children in fainting situations did not have trustworthy and protective helpers. They then take the action pattern of their tormentors. According to a new study, 14 per cent of parents report violent violence, The affected children are subjected to considerable violence. If you then consider that 90 per cent of all parents want to educate themselves without violence, but only create 30 per cent, then there is a reservoir for future violence users.

Educational Experts:

Can parental bullying counteract?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Building a healthy self-esteem is the best protection against entanglement in bullying. A good self-esteem develops in the early childhood over the experience of security.

Secure bonding experience is the best foundation for building patterns of behavior that protect a person from the humiliation of others, because with the experience of security, the ability to empathize is developed in the child's brain. Bullying is characterized by the absence of empathy. Children with a good self-esteem have no reason to bob. However, they can become victims.

In this case, however, they are more likely than others to seek help from teachers or their parents because they have gained the experience of trust in the course of their development.

Educational Experts:

What are the symptoms of parents' attention?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Parents should pay attention to everyday life. For example, if your child has been happy to go to school and have performed well, but if he does not get up early in the morning, he does not feel like going to school, feels uncomfortable, headache and / or stomach pain Complains about bullying. Parents should take these observations as a starting point for talking to their child.

Educational Experts:

And how can you help your child as a mother or father if it is already in a bullying situation?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

If there is a relationship of trust between the parents and the child, a child will also openly discuss his situation. Many children do not talk with their parents in such situations, because they feel that parents are not present in the emergency situations of school life, and they can not help them anyway. If a child is familiar with his / her parents, it is considered the highest commandment to do nothing without the knowledge and consent of the child.

In a real bullying case, a child has already lost considerable proportions of his self-confidence. If the parents turn behind the back of their child to the class teacher, then the rest of the trust goes down the stream. Parents should make it clear that they are completely on their side. In common considerations, she should consider the next steps. This can be talks with the teachers or the school management. Care must be taken to ensure that the child is safe in the following days and weeks. Victim protection is at the top of all measures.

Educational Experts:

How do you get out of this devil's circle as a bullying victim? Are there places where you can turn anonymous and where to get help?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

First of all, it is important from my point of view that the victim is looking for someone to trust him. They can be parents, good friends or relatives. In principle, victims can contact the school, local or regional counseling centers.

In general, bullying should be dealt with where it is created. This is the school for students and teachers. The school management must ensure that there is a morbid intercourse team of well-trained teachers, to whom students, but also teachers and parents, can turn.

Educational Experts:

How can such an intervention team help?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

The knowledge of the existence of an intervention team alone helps to calm the often turbulent events. It is therefore important that pupils, parents and teachers are informed about the functioning and competences of an intervention team. It is important to create an atmosphere of trust. Then - but only then - there are a lot of possibilities: talks with the victim; Talks between victims and perpetrators; Talks in small groups; Talks with the parents, talks with all parties involved.

Educational Experts:

When bullying, there is usually a "lead wolf" and several followers, who mobben because they are afraid to become a victim. What can I do if I am a student in such a situation?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

With the question, it is already suggested that the feeling of fear plays a decisive role in bullying. This experience makes some children become fellow travelers. For a constructive approach to bullying, it is crucial that the responsible adults have an idea of ​​the feelings of the actors in order to understand why children often feel incapacitated in such a situation.

The inner world of the followers is characterized by feelings of fear, impotence and insecurity. Compared to the victim, they behave "coldly," they give themselves submissive to the perpetrator. The ambivalence of their emotions often leaves them no peace and drives them to signal at least that something goes wrong here. Perpetrators have no reason to change the situation. In all cases, the basic feeling of anxiety. The pattern of feelings can be summarized as follows: The victim does not know why this happens to him. The perpetrator strives for power and superiority. Followers are torn to and fro. So it takes confidence and courage on the side of the victims and followers, if they want to change the situation. Unfortunately, these emotional potentials are often already severely impaired or even destroyed.

Educational Experts:

Are there typical victim images, or can bullying hit anyone?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Large, slender, small, fat, thin, handsome, and less handsome, clever, and less intelligent children can become victims. There is not the typical sacrifice. If, for example, a student with outstanding achievements becomes a victim, then it easily leads to the assumption that he is an aspirant and that this has become his doom. But it also affects students with learning and behavioral problems.

The victim is quickly searched for possible portions of the victim. It seems that we want to recognize the reasons for bullying as soon as possible. Often we orientate ourselves on external characteristics. It relieves us of the realization that in a bullying process there is an inner dynamic which we often do not understand. We must endure that we do not yet know why a person becomes the victim of a mobber.

There is also no answer to the question, with what sense a mobber chooses his victim. We know the structures of bullying, can describe the actions of the actors, have a knowledge about the consequences of bullying. We can also imagine the suffering of the affected victims. We can make hypotheses about the background and interplay of these complex group dynamics, but we do not yet have a knowledge of the finely woven interaction of inner patterns of action in connection with external events. The question remains: How does a perpetrator get involved in his victim?

Educational Experts:

"Cyber bullying", the bullying web page "Isharegossip", on which anonymous anonymous pupils and teachers abuse, caused a sensation. What is meant by "cyber bullying" and why is this topic so present?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Cyber ​​bullying is a variant of bullying. Persons are cursed, offended and defamed and excluded from internet activities. Often it is about sexual exclamations or certain sexual practices. It is in the widest sense a violation of personal life.

Cyberbullying is often used by those who also use violence in other ways, which is connected with bullying attacks, such as those occurring in school re-education. This means that cyber bullying can at least be partially dealt with by means of prevention and intervention measures, which are also used to counter bullying in the school community.

The consequences of cyber-bullying are regarded by some observers as devastating. There are cases where victims chose death as a "way out". According to a study, however, 84% of the students surveyed described cyber bullying as less severe than traditional bullying. Even with regard to the "big unknown", an investigation provides a "soothing" result: 89% of the victims know who is behind the humiliation.

This is a clear indication that in reality the phenomenon of bullying must be worked on. The well-known forms of prevention and intervention should take effect. Prevention is an individual aspect of building a sense of self-esteem; In relation to the school community, it is a question of constantly revising values, employment and social playing rules.

Educational Experts:

Can victims of bullying ever get rid of this role? Or, who has been bullied at school, must also be afraid of bullying as an adult? To whom can adult helpers turn for help?

Dr. Karl Gebauer:

Disciplined and worked bullying situations contribute to the development of psychosocial competence. This competence provides protection against future bullying situations.

If teachers are able to handle bullying in a cautious way, all parties can benefit from it. They are no longer helpless in future bullying situations. This applies to perpetrators, followers and victims. What is decisive is the experience that has been made to solve the problem. This experience leads to a pattern of success in the brain. If such a processing was not possible, then one can assume that this intensive negative experience is displaced. The associated anxiety can then be triggered by similar experiences.

Educational Experts:

Thank you for the interview! The interview was conducted by Sarah Dreyer

(Quelle: Bildungsexperten.net)

Bullying - Working world

The word bullying comes from the English of mob for "pack" or "rampaging heap". The corresponding verb to mob means "mob" or "attack someone". Generally speaking, the definition of bullying describes that a person is pressured by an individual or a group with a system.

Bullying is not to be confused with small quarrels or misunderstandings, these belong to the everyday life and the working world to it and are normal. Bullying is a targeted, permanent attack and exclusion of a person. Bullying is provocative harassment, deliberate humiliation, unreasonable degradation of performance, outburst, annihilating judgment. Behind the back is whispered and blasped, the really good work is criticized for no reason or important information is deliberately withheld. Mobbers often restrict their victims in their possibilities to communicate. It is hard for the victims to fight against bullying. Through mobbing, the social standing of the victims can be damaged by the mobbers spreading false rumors about the bullying victims. In this situation the victims feel helpless and left alone. Bullying can be found throughout the working world. Instead of working together on work goals, successes and new challenges, workers are fighting against envy and evil, they are confronted with hostility and exclusion.

Many workers can not cope with persistent bullying and the associated pressure and are suffering from physical-psychological illnesses.

If the devastating rumors are destructive and persistently directed against the victim, then this has the character of evil speech and one should take the judicial path.

The Criminal Code contains a number of acts that occur in connection with bullying: e.g. Insult (§185), obscene (§186) slander (§187), etc. Supervisors, who tolerate bullying, and even encourage them, are also guilty.

Every bullying victim should defend himself and the same at the beginning. The sooner you resist and show that you can not allow everything, the greater the chance to stifle the conflict in the bud.Bullying is not to be confused with small quarrels or misunderstandings, these belong to the everyday life and the working world to it and are normal. Bullying is a targeted, permanent attack and exclusion of a person. Bullying is provocative harassment, deliberate humiliation, unreasonable degradation of performance, outburst, annihilating judgment. Behind the back is whispered and blasped, the really good work is criticized for no reason or important information is deliberately withheld. Mobbers often restrict their victims in their possibilities to communicate. It is hard for the victims to fight against bullying. Through mobbing, the social standing of the victims can be damaged by the mobbers spreading false rumors about the bullying victims. In this situation the victims feel helpless and left alone. Bullying can be found throughout the working world. Instead of working together on work goals, successes and new challenges, workers are fighting against envy and evil, they are confronted with hostility and exclusion.

Many workers can not cope with persistent bullying and the associated pressure and are suffering from physical-psychological illnesses.

If the devastating rumors are destructive and persistently directed against the victim, then this has the character of evil speech and one should take the judicial path.

The Criminal Code contains a number of acts that occur in connection with bullying: e.g. Insult (§185), obscene (§186) slander (§187), etc. Supervisors, who tolerate bullying, and even encourage them, are also guilty.

Every bullying victim should defend himself and the same at the beginning. The sooner you resist and show that you can not allow everything, the greater the chance to stifle the conflict in the bud.

Steps against Mobber:

Competent initial consultations are provided by specialized lawyers, counseling centers, bullying consultants and trauma therapists.